Ten Things I Must Do Before I Die

Thanks to Lovely Lemony Lynn for making me consider my own mortality by asking me to write this list. Luckily there isn’t only one, and I am Highlander, so I am immortal. ( NOT an alien- nonsense- I will tell what there is only one of- GOOD Highlander films. All down hill from the first one! )

The legs on this sign swing like a pendulum. It is awesome.

10- Go to Vegas and get drunkenly married in the tackiest way possible, obviously involving an Elvis impersonator- possibly more than one, bridesmaids dressed as mermaids, and preferably some circus freaks. Now- regular readers will know I have sworn not to get married again so may be baffled by this one- but THAT has always been my dream wedding, and I am not bothered about it being legal. I just want to feel like I am in a David Lynch film.

9) Visit Gracelands. And more specifically the Gift Shop. I want all the tackiest things they sell. My Elvis Pres-ledge has been neglected of late because I can’t find anything nasty enough to add to it. I have a book by an Elvis collector. She has his toenail in a JAR! That level of tacky souvenir ownership is something I can only dream of.

8) Visit the Bay Area. I want to go to Alcatraz. I want to go to Haight-Ashbury. I want to see all the places named in Green Day songs. I want to go to Rudys for a Guinness milkshake. I want to go in a San Fran Tram. I want to see the Golden Gate bridge. I want to see Gilman Street. Cisco is my name after all!

7) I want to do a degree in English. I pretty much spurned formal education post a-levels and had a few crazy but great years playing and touring before baby number one came along. And since then I haven’t been able to afford it. But one day I shall do it. Probably as an old lady. I would love to get a Doctorate on my 90th birthday. Dr. Cisco has a certain ring about it…

6) I would LOVE to write a novel. But seeing as I struggle to go beyond a couple of hundred words on here I shall scale that dream down a little. I would LOVE to write scathing, witty, intelligent, perceptive, human and funny articles for weekend supplements. I also like big hair. I want to be Caitlin Moran.

Ooh- now this is the sort of shop I LIKE browsing in. Sod New Look.

5) Failing a sudden phone call from a National newspaper who decide randomly that what their readership needs is someone who writes a vaguely amusing blog, I want my own shop. It would be multi floored and sell books and records and objects of interest and junk and chocolate and coffee and posters and clothes and all sorts of random crap. I don’t have a business plan. Does it show? I think this idea is filed under what I would potter around and do with my days if I won the lottery.

4) I want to smoke. After my hissy fit the other day, I had some wonderful advice from people, and a good long think to myself, I do not want to start smoking again. I want to live to a ripe old age and see my children grown, and hold my grand-babies in my arms. I will not collect my Doctorate on my 90th birthday if I smoke now. So here is the deal. I will take up smoking again to reward myself for that Doctorate. I will have my next fag on my 90th birthday, with a Dirty Martini, as I celebrate joining the ranks of Academia.

3) Oh god. I want to put that I want to go to New York, but that would be the 4th American place I list, and there are more still to go. I like America. Or rather the idea of it, not the big flag waving, army wielding bit, but the quirky underbelly. A lot of it is music related- Sun Studios to CBGBs, there are so many places I want to see. Then there is the musical heritage, I want to go to Appalachia and hear bluegrass, New Orleans for Jazz, and Memphis for the blues, New York and Cisco for punk, and a thousand more places in between. So number three is America. Not going back and changing the others tho cos they are specific America, and this is America in general. I want soda fountains, and diners, and sock hops, and Cadillacs, and eggs over easy. Clearly I also need a vortex leading directly to America as seen on Happy Days. Yes. I want a cheer from the live studio audience when I enter a room.

Jodrell Bank. Probably looking for Vogons.

2) Space. The Final Frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship…. Bollocks to that. I get slightly anxious on a flight to Malta, so I wouldn’t survive being launched into space. And it’s looking unlikely that huge Enterprise size ships with duty-free shops and spas are gonna be built in my lifetime. So what I would love to do us go to a proper observatory. Like that one in South America with the massive array of telescopes, or Jodrell Bank, which is nearer Birmingham than Beunos Aires so a little more accessible. I want to see the stars through a massive telescope with my own eyes. Not just on the telly with the ultimate thinking woman’s crumpet and grammar school boy haircut sporting- Brian ‘I played keyboards in D-Ream’ Cox. Although I do love him a bit.

1) I want to do all them things up there, with my lovely man by my side. I want him to be the man at the bad fake vegas wedding, I want him on the steps of the college holding my hand when I collect my Doctorate. I want him as my partner in crime on my American escapades. I want to look to the furthest reaches of the universe, but know that my place is with him. I am soppy, but also carry the cynicism of someone who has had things go wrong before. I want to have had love that didnt go tits up.  I want this love to last til the end.  Poor him having to follow me round on that pile of requests. Although its swings and roundabouts. I will go on his dream list too! Can’t wait to watch Palace win the league, or visit the Ibanez Guitar Museum, or whatever it may be!

Love Miss Cisco XXX

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8 Comments

  1. June 15, 2012 / 10:52 am

    OMG I’ve done half your list.

    • Sonya Cisco
      June 15, 2012 / 1:05 pm

      Which ones? Spill…

  2. June 15, 2012 / 6:41 pm

    we are going to vegas for my 40th and am planning on renewing vows in some mad chapel with elvis and buy a dress out there get very drunk every night and pretent I’m 18 again! Mind would be a cake shop or a brollie shop. Good list. Oh a dI have to go to Sardinia if it kills me – sisters put me off new york re the bad food and bad attitude and bad ass tipping! x

    • Sonya Cisco
      June 16, 2012 / 3:24 pm

      Very jealous. It’s my 40th next year, but I doubt Vegas will be in the cards as Syd will still be under 2! Have an amazing time!

  3. Kat
    June 15, 2012 / 8:33 pm

    I’m not sure I could limit it to ten! Fab list though and hope you manage them all! x

    • Sonya Cisco
      June 16, 2012 / 3:24 pm

      Thanks Kat! Give it a go- would love to read yours! Xx

  4. Adventures of a Middle-aged Matron
    June 17, 2012 / 9:42 am

    I’ll be the first customer in that shop of yours! Please open it somewhere near me.

  5. Anonymous
    June 23, 2012 / 10:37 am

    I love you for all the reasons on your list, and vow to give you a live audience Happy Days-style cheer every time you walk in the room!

    Emsy x (who can’t quite work out how the internet works)

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