The Ways Toddlers Are Like Poltergeists

My mate Emma saw a rather peculiar sign in a shop window the other day. It said:-

‘Yes,’ she thought, ‘Of course I do.’
Cos you know, children are definitely real. The Sixth Sense would have been a shite film if the punch line had been ‘I see children.’
Having said that, living with a toddler does bear a certain amount of resemblance to sharing a house with restless spirits:-
  • Your belongings are moved by unseen hands. Only this morning I tracked down my phone to the wastepaper basket.
  • They steal your bedclothes in the night.
  • They speak in tongues.
  • They scrawl messages onto the walls. (toddlers are slightly less likely to use blood)
  • They leave behind a trail of ectoplasm.
  • They make unholy wailing noises in the dark.
  • You get a strange feeling that you are never alone. Even on the toilet.
SO bearing that in mind, do you believe in children?

Love Miss Cisco XXX

Share:

18 Comments

  1. Marilynn May 23, 2013 / 7:31 am

    This is hilarious. I definitely believe in children. The remote control for the TV in our bedroom has now been missing for 3 months. I have searched EVERYWHERE and it’s just gone. The power of toddlers should never be underestimated…Also, how can they sneak up right behind you without you hearing a single footstep when they normally stomp about like an angry elephant? I’m almost certain they use the power of levitation when no one is looking…creepy little monsters!

    • Sonya Cisco May 23, 2013 / 1:38 pm

      hahaha, our remote goes mysteriously missing regularly too! ANd yes, how do they suddenly do that creeping up on you thing?!

  2. blog off May 23, 2013 / 8:09 am

    My little H is SO good that I can’t help thinking that we got lucky, so I definitely believe in children – she doesn’t hide things or write on walls or anything. But she’s a great poet, scarily so. She’ll probably make up a poem for you when you stay over if she’s not being too shy.

    Actually, the only thing she’s really ever taken from me are several good nights of sleep, and boy do I need a catchup :-)

    • Sonya Cisco May 23, 2013 / 1:38 pm

      Sleep, don’t talk to me about sleep! haha! Cant wait to meet her!! :)

  3. Honestmum May 23, 2013 / 9:31 am

    Loved this! Definitely believe in children-they’re the monkeys keeping me up at night! Congrats on Bibs! See you at the awards!

    • Sonya Cisco May 23, 2013 / 1:40 pm

      Congrats to you too! See you there to clink glasses! :)

  4. Xandi | The Mummy Scripts May 23, 2013 / 12:59 pm

    Hilarious! What a bizarre sign. How could you not believe in them?! They are constantly there ALL the time, on your toes, hanging off you – hard to miss really. :-)

    • Sonya Cisco May 23, 2013 / 1:40 pm

      Yup, mine is currently stealing the glasses off of my face while I type!!

  5. sabrina montagnoli May 23, 2013 / 1:08 pm

    Yes I believe in children :) Very funny post x

    • Sonya Cisco May 23, 2013 / 1:41 pm

      Thank you! x

  6. Kate @craftsonsea May 23, 2013 / 7:06 pm

    Ohh, especially the talking in tongues one at the moment! (‘What was that? something about mists? Oh, you want crisps!)

    • Sonya Cisco May 24, 2013 / 7:19 am

      hahaha I know, Syd gets so insistent about stuff at times, and I have not a clue what he means!

  7. Tas D May 24, 2013 / 3:11 am

    Hahaa soooo true!! I discovered some ectoplasm today on the back of his neck and wondered if my brother had been messing about putting gel in his hair. But nope nope…it was snot. Nice.

    • Sonya Cisco May 24, 2013 / 7:19 am

      eeewwwwwww!!

  8. Actually Mummy... May 24, 2013 / 9:09 am

    That is hilarious. You Britmums fresh voice finalists are making my job bloody hard, you know! 😉

    • Sonya Cisco May 24, 2013 / 10:04 am

      Are you our judge?!? *gasps and sends Helen cake* haha, I do not envy you at all, the rest of the category is really outstanding- not quite convinced I deserve to be alongside them, but am bloody delighted nonetheless!!

  9. Lucy at Dear Beautiful Boy May 24, 2013 / 10:25 am

    Hahaha. So true. I definitely believe in children. x

  10. Emily Foran May 29, 2013 / 7:28 am

    Maybe no would be a good answer – if they’re just a figment of my imagination then I don’t have to stop reading blog posts to find out why they’re fighting ;)) xx

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge