Syd’s pre-school have been talking about what they want to be when they grow up, they even have to dress up as their chosen thing in a couple of weeks. Syd’s answer currently is ‘a blue Pikmin’.
For the uninitiated a Pikmin is a small character, that comes in various colours, from a video game that his brother plays. Nice to have an ambition, although I am baffled as to how to make the costume.
He very sweetly keeps asking me what I want to be when I grow up. I am not sure whether to be flattered that he thinks I am so young, or panicked that even at two he can see through my façade and figure out that I am not a proper grown up yet.
And I still don’t know what I want to be…..I am 40, you’d think I would have at least an inkling by now?! It has been on my mind a little lately as the clock ticks down towards Syd starting school in 17 months time. I don’t really have a plan other than I know I will get bored home alone most of the day and that I am unlikely to direct that energy into housework.
There is this little blog, that brings in a bit of money sometimes, either directly or by leading to work elsewhere. Maybe by then it will be enough, but describing myself as a writer still feels a little pretentious – ‘Pass me the laudanum, I must find my muse’ type thing.
In my mind I am torn between Consulting Detective and Time Lord. Possibly basing your preferred career choices on your favourite TV shows is another sign that I am not grown up enough to make these kind of decisions yet. The thought occurs that when I grow up I want to be Stephen Moffat, then I can combine writing with the above two fictional jobs.
Although I am not totally sure the BBC will be knocking on my door with a contract for writing a prime time television drama anytime soon, and frankly if they did I would get straight in my Tardis and run away in a panic.
My daughter is heading for UCAS form time. When she is feeling panicked about her choices I remind her that most people of my age have had more than one career by now, so she really shouldn’t feel that she will be boxed into whatever she chooses forever. Nor should she listen to anyone but her own heart. Yes, there are practical reasons for one thing being a more sensible choice than another, but since when was anyone excited by sensible. She is thinking of teaching, she is brilliant with kids and it would suit her well, as would any of the other similar vein jobs she also has on the consideration table.
As for me, the reality is that I will do whatever I can that fits around family life as smoothly as possible. I am not really bothered by having a fancy sounding career. I just want to be happy and for my family to be happy, and preferably to use overlong words when a simple four letter one would suffice.
I think happy is as good an ambition as any, don’t you?
Love Miss Cisco XXX