I don’t have time to write, it is half term so I am too busy :-
Making jam tarts that set me back a tenner in ingredients and a new bun tray, resulted in a kitchen and three humans coated in flour and nearly cost me my sanity. A bargain when you consider you can get a value pack for 50p.
Answering random questions and listening to random statements. You think Mail readers are stuck in their outdated opinions, well I reckon I could change their minds more easily than I can convince a two year old that the green thing he is pointing at is actually blue.
Being lectured in great detail about Minecraft. I have literally no idea what is going on, but have perfected the art of nodding and looking interested while mentally shopping for cushions. Nods wisely, ‘Yes, redstone.’
Refereeing a game my toddler calls ‘Splat’ and I call ‘head butting your brother’.
Having repeated conversations about CBeebies Land. How does he even know there is now a CBeebies Land? Is there a toddler psychic network that transfers important small person news throughout their community? I have tried explaining it is four and a half hours away by car, which is too far when you consider he gets sick on journeys lasting ten minutes, but he reckons we can avoid the puke by walking, and does not agree that a walk of that many miles is best left to people who are a) fit, and b) who can walk in the right direction for whole minutes at a time.
Supervising the removal and subsequent re-positioning of 28 Mr Men magnets. One casualty so far – Little Miss Tiny has become so tiny she is now invisible to the human eye. We put them all on the fridge. Then take them all off. Then put them all on the freezer. Then take them all off. Then we take them in the lounge and put them all on the storage heater. Then take them all off and head back to the fridge. I have not been so intellectually stimulated since I went through a phase of watching Neighbours as a teenager.
In between all this I am trying to come up with genius ways to get us all out of the house without bankrupting myself, re-stocking the cupboards every 25 seconds, as having the big two home for half term is the equivalent of opening your kitchen to a plague of particularly peckish locusts, and intervening in the bickering that occurs whenever I leave the room to try and get some washing/cooking done. The toddler is being especially trying without his usual routine of activities, playgroups and pre-school. Why do they stop everything in the weeks I need them the most?!
I definitely don’t have time to write, luckily I have a new app that just transfers my thoughts directly from brain to screen, so handy at times like this….Anyway, must dash, am being repeatedly asked whether I need a sieve, and if I don’t come up with a reason to need that sieve soon there will be a tantrum,
Love Miss Cisco XXX